Selfishness

We explain what selfishness is, what types exist and what selfish love is. In addition, we tell you what a selfish person is like.

selfishness
Selfishness has been a morally condemnable trait in various religions and ethical codes.

What is selfishness?

Egoism, in general terms, It is a behavior of excessive attachment to one's own well-being, which neglects or directly violates that of others. Selfish people, therefore, are those who only think about themselves and hardly dedicate any effort or attention to the needs of others.

the word selfishness comes from Latin voices ego (“I”) and –ism (suffix that expresses tendency or doctrine), and appears in the Spanish language in 1786, possibly borrowed from French, English or Italian. It arose along with the word egotistwhich has the same meaning but today is reserved for literature and poetic speech.

Selfishness has been a morally reprehensible trait since ancient times; In fact, the vast majority of religions and ethical codes reject it and instead encourage brotherhood and love between people. It is one of the personality traits that in children's stories are attributed to evil characters or characters destined to learn a lesson, as occurs in “The Selfish Giant” by Oscar Wilde (1854-1900).

On the other hand, selfishness is a topic of analysis and reflection for psychology, sociology and philosophy (both ethics and morality), and even for biology: ethologists and students of animal behavior understand it as a behavior opposite to altruism, and which consists of defending the organism's own interests above the collective interests of, for example, the herd itself or some other group of competitors. In that sense, biological selfishness is part of what Charles Darwin called “survival of the fittest.”

Characteristics of a selfish person

Selfish people are characterized by the following:

  • put their personal benefit before the collective at all times, even when a small self-sacrifice would bring enormous benefits to others.
  • It is difficult for them to let go of their own share it, or pass up opportunities in favor of others.
  • tend to monopolize attention especially in a group, and become impatient when they have to listen to others.
  • try to make a profit tangible to all the situations in which they intervene.
  • They apply the law of minimum cost, that is, always give the minimum of their time, effort or money when doing something, or they look for a way to do it in the most comfortable or convenient way for them.
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Types of selfishness

According to psychology, there are three different types of selfishness, which are:

  • Egocentric selfishness. The egocentric is one whose social world revolves around his ego, that is, who compares absolutely everything with his desires. These types of people tend towards victimhood and a lack of empathy, since in their order of priorities an excessive ego leaves little free space for others. In that sense, egocentrics use others for their own purposes and do not usually take much interest in the well-being of others, except when this affects their own.
  • neutral selfishness. Also called “conscious selfishness,” this type of selfishness is one that puts one's own fundamental needs before the need to please others, but does so in a more rational and moderate way, often as part of a method of self-help or self-help. improvement of self-esteem. Neutral selfishness is that promoted by “help yourself first” doctrines that establish the need to take care of oneself before taking care of others, since otherwise it is impossible to genuinely help.
  • altruistic selfishness. This oxymoron or union of contradictory terms refers to behavior that seeks one's own benefit, but in such a way that it is also beneficial for a third party. That is, an altruistic egoist always gives priority to his affairs, but strives to carry them out in a way that is useful to others.

selfish love

Certain types of love are commonly called “selfish love.” romantic or loving relationships that subordinate the interests of one of the individuals to those of the other, instead of being even-handed and giving both parties equal enjoyment or importance. That is, selfish love is an unhealthy love, whose attachment is useful or pleasant only for one of the parties, which can generate harm, sadness or dissatisfaction in the other.

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Selfish love can be called by many names: toxic love, toxic relationships, manipulative love, among others. Naturally, it is not a form of love that should be encouraged or desirable.

Moral egoism and rational egoism

From the point of view of philosophy, there are two schools of thought regarding egoism, that is, two approaches that perceive it as an object of interest and that formulate different approaches around it. These tendencies are moral egoism (or ethical egoism) and rational egoism.

  • Moral egoism. Linked to the philosophical doctrines of subjectivism, moral egoism proposes that the only way to cope with one's own existence is in a selfish way, that is, that the social ethics of individuals must always act in their own interest, which does not prevent , by acting, an accidental or secondary benefit is also generated for other people. Thus, the moral egoist defends that everyone should look after their own benefit, but also that human groups (such as countries or organizations) should do so, since our own needs are the only thing we really know, and by trying to satisfy the needs of others we can end up doing more harm than good.
  • Rational egoism. Linked to the philosophical doctrines of objectivism, rational egoism proposes that the search for one's well-being must come from a rational, objective, logical evaluation that is removed from the moral aspects that define, for example, moral egoism. From this point of view, altruism is a vice that satisfies others but never the individual himself, and therefore leads to discomfort and collectivism, that is, to unfairly putting the desires of the mass before those of the individual.

Positive and negative selfishness

Another approach to distinguishing between forms of selfishness is that which opposes a positive or healthy selfishness to a negative and unhealthy selfishness. The difference between one and the other lies in the degree of responsibility one has towards the group or towards the needs of the other. So, we have to:

  • positive selfishness It is one that allows individuals to seek their own benefit without incurring harm to others, and it is what is put into practice when we carry out actions that benefit or please us, at the same time that they benefit and please others. companion. Mutual benefit, seen this way, is only possible if both people exercise positive selfishness.
  • negative selfishness It is one that causes harm to third parties (or allows them to suffer indirect harm) to obtain personal benefit, and it is the most morally repudiated form of selfishness, since the individual who practices it completely separates himself from the collective well-being or that of others. thus focusing solely and exclusively on what you want or need.
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Phrases about selfishness

Some famous phrases about selfishness are the following:

  • “The selfish person loves himself without rivals.” Cicero (106-43 BC), writer and politician of Ancient Rome.
  • “No one is ever secondary to himself.” François Rabelais (1494-1553), French writer.
  • “The selfish person would be capable of setting fire to the neighbor's house in order to fry an egg.” Sir Francis Bacon (1561-1626), British philosopher and essayist.
  • “Man is man's wolf.” Thomas Hobbes (1588-1679), British philosopher and political scientist.
  • “There is no true happiness in selfishness.” George Sand (1804-1876), writer of French origin.
  • “The great egoists are the breed of the great evil ones.” Concepción Arenal (1820-1893), Spanish writer.
  • “An egoist is a person who thinks more about himself than about me.” Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914), American writer and editor.
  • “The only acceptable selfishness is to ensure that everyone is well in order to be better.” Jacinto Benavente (1866-1954), Spanish playwright.

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References

  • “Selfishness” on Wikipedia.
  • “Moral egoism” on Wikipedia.
  • “Egoism” in the Language Dictionary of the Royal Spanish Academy.
  • “Etymology of Egoism” in the Online Spanish Etymological Dictionary.
  • “Selfish love: is it possible for love to exist where there is only selfishness?” in RPP Noticias (Peru).
  • “Egoism” in Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy.